Watching With Great Joy...

The past couple days, I have tried to take my own advice to slow down and live in the moment. It has brought me more joy than I have had in a long time. I have enjoyed my children while watching, listening, and talking with them. Yesterday morning, I listened to my oldest daughter singing along with her music while getting ready to go on a trip to MN. I watched my youngest son pick up a book to read on his own several times, which blessed me greatly, as he was my late reader. He even read his own math story problems to himself, correctly answering all the problems. I saw the second youngest son step up with maturity in helping me around the house. The five of us went out to eat for dinner last night, and the boys recited Psalm 23 to Dad, then told him how they learned about Samson that day. The youngest had lots of insight accompanied with many questions about God's ways. I was smiling big on the inside.

Most of the time, I hate to confess, I am in a hurry to get things done around the house, only half listening and nodding “uh-huh” more times than not. Focusing on me or things really depletes my joy while bringing on unnecessary stress.

Do you know what I have determined? I have wonderful children, and so do you!!!

Somehow, in this hectic, fast-paced world, full of activities and running, we need to find the time - make the time - to “just be”. Sometimes we get so busy “doing” to try to give our children all the opportunities the world tells us they need to have, that we miss out on the greatest opportunity of “just being” which is the most priceless gift they must have.

Take time this week to “just be” and enjoy your kiddos. They are a precious gift from God to be trained, loved, and greatly enjoyed.

The 11th Commandment - Thou shall not eat breakfast cereal...

Do you ever feel like you do not measure up? That you are not holy enough? That you are not as good a chrisitan as your friends are? Or as good as the writers of the blogs/websites you read?

Here is another question...Is being a “good” christian even Biblical? I do not think it is. If someone were a good christian, then that means there would have to be such thing as a better christian. I think the Bible says that when we are born again, we are considered righteous in God's eyes because of the blood of Jesus that covers our sins. Can someone be more righteous? Again, not in God's eyes. Righteous is righteous, right? I do, however, believe that some christians can be more obedient than other christians, and that is a whole different story.

What does this have to do with breakfast cereal anyway? Hold on...I am getting there :-)

God made laws of which we should all abide – The 10 Commandments. We can never 100% obey them, or we would be sinless. And there is only one man I know of that did that! None the less, with the help of the Holy Spirit, we can find the strength and desire to obey. On another note, we have a personal relationship with Christ, and He works in each individual life differently, which means our lives will look differently within obeying the Lord's commands.

Christians from all around come from different cultures; have different family dynamics; hold different jobs; were purposely created with different personalities, sizes, shapes, hair color, skin color, etc; possess different giftings; battle different health issues; and on and on and on.  Obviously our lives will not look the same. So why do we get so depressed and feel worthless as though we do not measure up to others? Satan's lies for sure and human nature, of course.

I admire people who eat all organic food, choose to not have cable TV, live off-grid, have family devotions twice a day, own a family business, have students who achieve off-the-chart academics, do not use birth control...insert other admirations you have here. And until recently, I thought those people were better christians than me. More holy. More righteous. More favored. Then I realized that those kinds of thoughts held me in bondage and made me envious, then bitter, then judgemental. And, boy...did I ever turn into an ugly, self-righteous individual!  For many years – and lost friends because of it.

God is freeing me from this line of thinking and showing me that I do not have the same make-up, same lifestyle, same life circumstances, or same heritage as others. And ya know what? It is okay. It really is!  So one day, about a month ago, I stocked up on some breakfast cereal at our local Amish discount store. My budget is tight. My mornings are busy. My children like it. (I cook good evening meals anyway :-) ) Guess what? I did not turn into a pillar of salt or get consumed with fire because I did not make some healthy, green smoothie for breakfast. It works for us. God knows our situation, and he knows yours. Do not let someone else's personal convictions become your chains. Cut yourself some slack. Relax. Live. Enjoy where God has you!

A Full Embrace...

I was looking at old files and ran across something I had written five months ago as a FB post.  It had left my memory.  Oh how I needed this reminder today.  Today is my daughter's 14th birthday. Besides the birthday celebration, we had a lot on our plate..."things" and "stuff".  The joy of the day got away from me as my thoughts became worries; my worries turned into frustration; my frustration turned into anger; and I let my joy be stolen.  I did not embrace God as I should, therefore could not embrace others as I should.   I am thankful for God's loving rebuke.  I need to right my wrong and pray that this word received long ago would not be forgotten again:   

November 2013 - I woke up this morning and just stayed in bed so I could be still and pray - something I do not do near enough in the hours of a silent home. I prayed about much. I found myself praying for God to call His people to Himself and pour out His spirit on His church, His bride; for us to desire Him. Then, I said to God, “But I do not think we can fully come to you, fully desire you, unless we let 'things' go.” Immediately following, a vision came into mind. I began to chew on that vision/thought and it expanded. Have you ever tried to give someone a full embrace with your hands full? For me, I thought of how I want to give my husband a hug when he gets home, and as he pulls in the drive, I start heading for the door. But after a long day with children and housework, I find my self picking up or doing things along the way: that toy on the floor, the wrapper not thrown away, the blanket unfolded, the coat draped over the chair, timer going off on the oven...just picking these things up as I go to greet my husband. I go with the intention to fully embrace him, and all I can do is lean in toward him and give him a kiss on the cheek, because my hands/arms are too full of “stuff” - unimportant, unessential stuff.

 

What happened to the full embrace? Love given in full measure? I think this is what the church, His bride, does with Christ. We want the fullness of God, the power of God, the love of God, but we do not approach Him with empty arms. We are picking stuff up along the journey - “unimportant, unessential stuff”: money, career-driven lives, making a name for ourselves, busyness, clean house, vacations, debt, entertainment, fine dining, keeping up with the Jones's, and heavy burdens we were never expected to carry such as guilt and shame and condemnation– cumbersome loads to carry. So we pick all this stuff up and approach the throne to embrace our Creator, the supposed lover of our life, and all we can do is lean in and give a kiss on the cheek, because we will not drop the “stuff” to be able to give the full embrace. This broke my heart when God showed me this in the morning hours. But I am thankful.  I wanted to share this with my friends, because it is a loving word of encouragement. He is waiting for the full embrace with His arms wide open...are ours?

An Unexpected Oasis...

"I believe we would be happier to have a personal revolution in our individual lives and go back to simpler living and more direct thinking." - Laura Ingalls Wilder 


Some may wonder why our hearts are so drawn to Iowa. What is the big deal about corn fields and pigs anyway? In the physical realm, your question is most validated. However, in the spiritual realm, Iowa was an oasis that God chose to give to us following some difficult years of living and walking life through a desert. (I will share more about the desert life later on in blog life.)

Have you ever felt like you live something similar to the “life of Job” and just need a new start? A refreshing rain? We did. Joy came after mourning...much mourning. We were living in Illinois – my husband born and raised there/myself born in Iowa, only living there a year or so, then moving to IL. For almost 40 years, our lives were spent in IL. There were good times and bad times those years, but the latter of those were full of suffering and God was good.

Long story short – we made some wonderful friends that I still talk with today. One of those friends gave me something...the homesteading bug! It was 2006, and we met a family that lived on a farm. And I, being the Laura Ingalls fanatic that I am, watched them live life the way I had always dreamed of but had no idea how. Over the course of the friendship, I saw horses/pigs/sheep/goats being cared for; garden planted, harvested, and preserved; sewing; baking; hospitality; the love of learning; ministry; a strong faith in God accompanied with positive attitudes; and family unity and vision. AND I WANTED THAT!

God provided a job opportunity for my husband in Iowa, so in March of 2009, we loaded up the moving truck and began a new chapter in our life. Another long story short – God blessed us with a 50 acre farm which included barns, pasture, tillable land, 38 acres of timber and a river running the back of the property. It was truly a miracle!

Oh, the stories I have to share with you sometime. Any readers old enough to remember the show “Green Acres”? Ummm....that was us. Luckily, we met our 80 year old neighbors down the hill, whom we later adopted into our family. They taught us how to live farm life and was it ever good! Within 2 years, we had a garden growing both seasons; harvested fruit from our trees/grapevine; acquired chickens, 1 horse, 4 pigs (two died prematurely because we were....well...newbies, so we bought two more. And boy did they taste yummy!), our dairy cow, Annie, lots of cats, and Lily, our Australian Shepherd farm dog; hunted the property; worked on the house; rescued an abandoned deer; killed coons trying to get in the hen house...well, you get the idea.

Our family learned that living a simple life is not...simple. It is hard work. It takes family unity and vision. It takes faith. Those few years were the best years of my life. We endured the hot/humid Iowa summers in the garden. We learned that when you have livestock you will have deadstock. We saw the cycle of life throughout all of nature. We saw the importance of loving your neighbor, literally. We worked hard, physical labor, got dirty, and wiped the sweat off our brow. We were happy. We were healthy. We smiled a lot more.

Then, in a quick turn of events we had to sell the farm in 2011. Three months later, we moved to Tennessee. And in August of 2013 – we moved back to our earthly home...Iowa. And the farm adventures begin anew :-)

For those of you who asked...

With great hesitation and fear (because I am very technologically challenged), I have exceeded to the request of some of my friends to start a blog.  This is my first post of many, I am sure.  I am still trying to learn how to format my blogspot, so please be patient with me.  Through this blog, I hope to inspire your faith, make you laugh, expand your thoughts, encourage your dreams, share my musings, and vent when I have had a bad day.  May "Simply Tori Lynne" be a blessing to you as I openly share my life's journey with you from Iowa, The Great Hawkeye State.